Woe is me (or how to get a little perspective)

Oh, woe is me... I have the money and the health to pick up and move in less than a month (which started right after my hysterical crying fit).

 

Oh, woe is me... I have many many boxes full of stuff that I no longer want and have to drive ALLLL the way downtown to drop it off...

 

Oh, woe is me... I'm allergic to the cardboard boxes (I got for free) and I have SO MUCH stuff that I need to use a lot of boxes...

 

I had the following quote from Friends playing in my head all weekend... My wallet's too small for my fifties AND MY DIAMOND SHOES ARE TOO TIGHT.

 

I got a little perspective on Saturday (through no fault of my own I might add... I was just going about my business).

 

I finally got around to taking my donation items to the WISH foundation.  Two boxes of dishware, one box of food that is perfectly fine but gives me a tummy ache (Fibre One bars are evil!), two bags of toilettries and perfumes (not cheap!), a garbage bag full of clothes, towels and blankets and a rubbermaid bin full of stuffed animals and blankets.  Woe was me when I had to make five or six trips up the stairs from my apartment to put this all in the car... Woe was me when I had to spend a fortune in gas to drive across town to the 'sketchy' area to drop these things off... And absolutely woe was me when the volunteer at the WISH Foundation said that yes, they do want the stuffed animals because 'some of the ladies have kids or grandkids at home'.  Uh... full stop... remember what I said the WISH foundation was for?  Survivial Sex Workers.  Women who resort to selling their bodies for sex to get by one. more. day.  And these women have GRANDKIDS at home?  That was more than I could take and my mind and heart shut down in a poor attempt to prevent a catastrophic breakdown on the steps of the building.

The more I thought about it, the more it didn't compute.  I thought about my grandma... (who sent freshly made gingersnaps to me via my mom on Sunday.).  I thought about the classic 'grandma' portrayal on television that absolutely does not include the grandmas living on the streets and prosituting themselves... Woe was me no longer as I desperately wanted to pack everything I owned into a moving truck and take it to the WISH Foundation.  To figure out some way that I might help these women... between a full time job with the government, the necessity of grocery shopping and taking care of a kitty and my not so busy social life... how could I ever make time...  Time will be made.  I grouse on and on about how women need to stand together, stick up for eachother and take care of one another.  What more important way in this very moment can I make that happen... walk the talk and get my hands dirty helping!

 

Woe was me about ten minutes later when my gas light on my paid-off car started dinging alerting me to the fact that I didn't have enough gas to get home.  Woe was me when I had to drive three blocks out of my way in order to make the left turn required to get to the gas station.  Woe was me when I had to consider packing my iphone, my wallet and my camera into my hundreds of dollars custom leather handbag while I pumped gas or just use the automatic door locks and leave it all on the seat.  Woe was me when a wind picked up and I had to put my hand knitted scarf around my neck while I stood pumping liquid gold into my car that is really too big for just one person to commute to and from my government job...

 

While I was pumping my gas, a disinfranchised man stood on the other side of the pump and started chatting to me.  He was so far beyond threatening... he intentionally stood with a gas pump and garbage can between us and struck up conversation. I asked him questions about himself and took an interest in him... for whatever reason, my normally cold and dismissive attitude took a vacation and I felt like the five minutes I was going to have to be there would be well served by not pretending this guy was invisible.  I'm not naive by any stretch of the imagination when it comes to the stories that people make up in order to separate you from your money, however for whatever reason, I actually believed him.  He's a sheetmetal worker/roofer by trade from Scarsborough Ontario.  He moved here three months ago expecting to find work in the construction trade and is now resorting to riding his bicycle around and picking up empties.  Once a week he buys a loaf of bread and a jar of peanut butter with his 'earnings' from doing day labor for construction crews.  Usually he doesn't work more than about an hour a day for them... probably picking up debris on the sites or digging holes...

Once I was done filling my tank with gas, he asked me if I may have had any empties in my car that I could give to him.  Not for money... for recycling.  I said I'd check and ended up giving him 8-10 bottles... and he was so thankful!  I gave him essentially GARBAGE and he was so thankful!  Woe was me... I looked in my purse and all I had was a few pennies and a loonie... Normally I don't give money to people because I figure they're going to buy drugs or alcohol with it... but I thought... who cares!  Whatever he does with his money is up to him... Only by the Grace of God and hardwork do I not have to dig in public trashcans for empty pop cans to return for a nickel. I gave him the loonie and he looked like I'd given him a $100 bill... and he said he was now pretty close to being able to get a slice of hot pizza for his dinner.

 

As I drove off, I was again reminded that comparitively speaking, I have no woe... Of course everyone has woe... everyone has issues and things going on in their lives that they worry about, complain about, struggle with...  I work my butt off at work, I haven't made poor choices (alcoholism, drug use...).  I stayed in school, I respected my parents and the rest of my family and I'm honest... I've worked damn hard to make this life for myself where I can have a custom made leather handbag, name brand glasses and an iPhone.  But one poor choice... one economic downturn... one health issue is all we all are away from being in a position that we never thought we would be in... where we have to rely on the charity of those in a better place to help us.  I am that person right now.  I'm in a good place...  I can give my time (because I can't really afford to give a lot of money).  I can give my kind heart, my strong shoulders and my warm smile to someone who doesn't have anything else.  I can do it and I will.  I have to... because if we all decided someone else would do it.... well... the math on that is not favorable...

 

I've been reading blogs lately about strong and powerful women who have given themselves for the fight against famine in Africa... who dig wells and build houses in neglected parts of the world... and it's inspiring... but it also leaves me wondering... if we all give of ourselves in empovrished countries... who helps at home?  Every country will have a percentage of people who are living beyond the system... who don't have a steady supply of food or a roof over their heads.  Just because Canada has such a small percentage compared to other nations doesn't mean that we just accept that as collateral damage and give our time and money to the worse off countries... does it?  Is it not just as honorable to work at home?  In your own community?  Where there are no accolades... where the charity is just as needed but the landscape isn't as stark a contrast... That's where I want to help.  In my own community.  That's where I will help.  In my own community.

 

If you want to put back into your community, there are many ways that you can do so at your own, local level... some ways are:

 

Donate to the food bank (time, or money... I know for the Vancouver food bank, every dollar you give is equal to $3 in buying power... so it's better to bring money than canned goods, altho they'll take anything!)

Donate time, money or goods to your local women's shelter

Find an independant charity in your community that helps sex trade workers, provides education, provides rehab and shelter 

Donate books and magazines to shelters

Volunteer with your local crisis line

Volunteer to drive elderly people to and from the grocery store and doctor's appointments

 

 

Anyway, off my soap box for now... likely this is the last post until the weekend because I'm going to be in the last sprint towards packing the rest of my stuff and moving across town.

Talk to you on the flip side... or the Oak side as I like to call it....

BLESS YOU!

 

 

The packing continues... I've now put green tape on every kitchen cupboard that has been emptied... that's 12 of them...

I made two boxes of kitchen items I no longer want... old dishes, drinkware etc... I was going to take these to Value Village, but from what I understand, Value Village supports Salvation Army and if there's one 'charity' that I refuse to support in any fashion, it's Salvation Army.  Not. Ever!

I also have two bags full of toiletries and perfumes that I no longer wear and there's a foundation here in Vancouver called WISH.  It's for self identified female survival sex workers.  Basically women who see/have no other way to make a 'living'.  They provide health care, shelters, education and a safe place for these women to turn.  So I looked on their website and they also take (besides the toiletries that I have been collecting specifically for them) clothing, towels, bedding, shoes... so I emailed them and asked them if they also wanted these donated dishes... if they provide food and shelter, then perhaps they may need these items... I also asked if they wanted books... I've taken a bucketload of books over to my mom's for our garage sale but whatever doesn't sell is going to be donated to WISH.

If you live in Vancouver (or the Vancouver area) and would like to donate to WISH, I would be very happy to help facilitate that.  Their 'WISH List' is here.

 

So... with all the charity stuff spoken for, it turns out I'm doing pretty well on my packing... I have to stop at this point tho because there's no more room to put boxes in such a way that it doesn't freak the cat out... or squish him...also, the contact dermatitis only likes it if I pack every second day or so... and my allergies agree...packing sure kicks up a lot of dust...

 

It turns out that I probably won't get a chance to paint in the apartment before I move in... money is tight... I think the cat would rather have his litter box and litter and I would rather have laundry detergent than have painted walls...we'll see tho... I have some of the paint, so I can probably get some of it done...

 

Not much else to report... but as soon as I get in there, I'll take some pictures...

Of COURSE you do...

 

As of this very moment, the contact dermatitis on my hands is gone... mostly.  Wanna know why?  Because I haven't touched a single packing box or item since Saturday afternoon.  Wanna know what I'm doing when I get home?  Giving myself another round of contact dermatitis... because I, apparently, am allergic to the effing boxes!

 

Love it!  Couldn't be loving this little curve ball ANY BETTER!

You ate WHAT for dinner?

 

I have some of my best ideas when I'm compromised... as in, wouldn't it be fun to play with a staple gun after I had two (or three-ish) drinks and mini eggs for dinner last night...

 

Now, before you get all bent out of shape, the thing I did was related to the move and before I did that, I packed another box full of stuff, so technically... wait... why am I making excuses to you??  I can do whatever I want!

 

So last night after work I went and got my tattoo touched up.  Man alive, it hurt worse than the first time and let me tell you, when you accidentally whack a new tattoo with a hard sharp piece of plastic, it does NOT feel good!  After my dinner of champions, I decided to turn the tv off (because I was too drunk to decide on something else to watch and what I was watching was creeping me out) and do something toward the move.  So I packed the dvd's and found more video games that are being donated to a charity.  I started looking around for something else to pack and had one of those 'OMG, I have to pack everything... its too overwhelming so I'll pack nothing' moments and decided to reupholster my dining chairs instead.  If you recall from a previous post on the weekend, I stained the chair bodies and they're sitting at my sister's house waiting for next Saturday's delivery day. (These are the same chairs that I realized the day AFTER garbage day that I'd 'purged' the screws that attach the seat to the frame...)

 

Years ago when I found the chairs and had very ambitious plans to recover them immediately (and before I took up knitting and the yarn ate up every spare space in the house, not to mention that I also lived with a hoarder) I went to see my friend Roger who has a drapery workroom.  He has oodles of remnants of some pretty gorgeous fabric and as his 'adopted project/daughter', I'm pretty spoiled and I got my choice for the chairs.  I happened to pick out a fabric that retails for well over $100/yard... it's gorgeous tho... cut chenile and satin... taupe and dark charcoal.... divine!

 

So last night, in my pretty sloshed state I decided to recover the cushions so they'll be ready to attach to the chairs.

I was very impressed with how straight and even and tight that I got everything... the only problem is that the staples I have are only long enough to go through two layers of the fabric (which itself is pretty thick upholstery fabric) and at the front of the seat is an overhang, which ends up having about four or five layers of the fabric... so I need to go and get some upholstery tacks to finish that little part.

 

Here's a before and after...(please excuse the bag of garbage in the background!)

 

 

 

This weekend I'm going to pack and clean and hopefully get in to the studio with Sharon to work on my art project.  I should also probably go to the pet store and get the stuff for Mr. Fluffypants and buy some paint... So much to do... so little time to do it in... a smart person would suggest not getting drunk on a weekday so that more stuff gets done...

The voice in your head...

About a year ago last December I was in charge of moving about 60 people from 4 different sites to one new consolidated location.

Every site had a site lead, including the one I personally worked at.  They were the secretaries for the most part.  Because I was managing the larger project, I was told that I would NOT have to manage the packing/purging of the site I worked at... that our secretaries (three) would do it.

 

I spent four weeks gently encouraging the staff to pack... to do a little bit at a time... Every day that went by made me more and more anxious because I knew if they didn't do it, I would be the one stuck with it...

 

The day before the moving truck was to come.... at 3pm (when the staff leave at 4), nothing was packed.  The stationary cupboards were still overflowing with, well, stationary.  The supply cabinets were jammed to the brim with supplies... it was not a good sight.  I went in to my manager's office and had a minor freak out... and then she and I spent the next four hours packing... We, the two people who had the MOST to do based on the larger project, spent four hours packing the stuff the secretaries 'didn't have time for'.

 

I distinctly remember wanting to scream at the top of my lungs and start flinging things in a fit of rage... The whole while that we were packing I was ranting about how leaving things to the last minute only hurts yourself, how it was really inconsiderate of them not to do anything and how they had FOUR WEEKS to do this and we were doing it at the last second.

 

The reason that I tell you this story is because in the car this morning my friend asked me if I remembered how I felt about them not packing... About my anxiety over the weeks and weeks of non-action... that not even the stuff that never gets used was packed.... I said I did remember very well how that felt...

 

And then she yelled at me that she was feeling the same way about my apartment that I felt about the secretaries... that there's ELEVEN YEARS of stuff in that house that has to be processed and every time she hears that I've dicked around buying cupcakes and beach walking with Sam, it makes her more and more anxious...(I didn't tell her that I went to bed at 7:30 last night...)

 

And THEN... I got to thinking about it... The contents of this... the contents of that... oh and this.. AND THAT!... uh oh!

 

I've decided that it's probably not feasible to only pack when the cat is gone... I'm going to need to pack some now... gently... tidily... a box here and a box there... stacked into tidy piles that don't freak the little fuzzball out... So I'm starting tonight... I'm going to pack the big cabinet in the bonus area, whatever is under the bonus sofa and the bathroom cabinet.  I'm also going to at least pull out the chair seats from under the other sofa (vacuum them off) and then see about recovering them maybe tomorrow... 

 

If someone that knows me very well is worried about how little I've done (when really, I've done quite a lot), then perhaps it's time to step up the game... There are 15 sleeps till moving day...

You can't make mEEEEEE (or how I saved $90!)

 You'd think that I would have taken the four glorious days that I had off from work and done something... anything towards my move.  You'd think that... yes you would.  Did I?  Barely... and I mean BARELY!

 

Thursday night Sam and Kathleen and I went for a salon appointment (which went on until 10pm) and then went to a favorite hole in the wall spot (it used to be just Kathleen's favorite but now it's a communal favorite!) and had Okonomyaki.  It's sometimes referred to as 'Japanese Pancake'.  For a warm, saucy, smushy food lover such as myself, it was beyond fabulous!  I want to go there right now!

 

 

After that, Sam went to his home and Kathleen and I went to mine and before I'd even given the kitty his treats and said hello, Kathleen had launched herself into bed... which was fine by me because I was so tired and out of it that I fell asleep on the sofa at the hair dresser!

 

Just when we were on the cusp of falling asleep, Kathleen started inquiring about my storage locker and whether we could rearrange and ammalgamate some boxes in order to make 'less' and therefore get rid of my storage locker completely.  I have to say, I wasn't really into the idea and I really didn't want to fart around with the storage, but after we went to Ikea and picked up some awesome deals on Friday for my new place, the mission was set and off we went to thin out the herd in the locker.  As it turned out, Kathleen was right, and we managed to donate enough stuff and reorg enough stuff into boxes together that I will be able to completely get rid of the storage locker when I move!  That's $90 a month!  I'm not too proud to say I was wrong and I'm very thankful to my very smart friend!

 

Saturday was a lovely day spent with my family and then very late at night with my friend.  Once Easter dinner had been had and I was on my way back home, Sam called and wanted me to come and get him and take him to get Easter candy, so at 11:30 at night we were fooling around in the Easter Candy aisle of the local 24hr drugstore. While at dinner, I took a few minutes and applied some stain to some old chairs I found a million years ago... I bought them from an antique store in town for $20 for the pair and my G'pa sanded them down about three years ago... finally I'll have a place to put them, so I snuck away to stain them and then my lovely sister and her man brought them home for me (to their home) and will deliver them to me in two weeks.

 

 

On Sunday I went and met another friend and we went to the art supply store and then to her studio for some art fun.  We'd been planning it for a while and I'm very happy with how my project is turning out so far!  It's for my new apartment and it's pretty neat... This picture is just of the base of it so far... it needs it's 'art' and then it's epoxy top... this same friend is an actual artist and while I was making my project, she was cleaning her studio and I got 'hired' to be her art storage depot... as in, I have so many walls now with no art to hang on them, so I'm going to help her out by hanging her art in my house... it's a perfect match... I have a love affair with her art and she needs somewhere to store it.

 

 Speaking of art, I've come up with the paint color scheme for the new apartment also...

What do you think?

 

 

Yesterday was a rather lazy day which consisted of sleeping in until 11, being picked up to go on errands, going back home, napping and then having a special cupcake delivery at 11 last night.  We also got to see a house being torn down... how very destructive!

 

 

I feel like I need a holiday from my short holiday and also to actually DOOOO something toward moving...

Dingy Women

I found a blog entry over at Edenland... (you should go and read the recent ones!  it's important).  Someone told her to 'get over her childhood'.  Nice hey?  But it got me to thinking... she's a tough woman.  She falls down and she gets back up again. 

 

I know I've mentioned on this blog here numerous times in the last year that I know some incredibly strong women that fall down and get back up again.  These are what I now like to call Dingy Women. (Like a dingy you paddle around... not like the color of old dirty paint.).

 

They get in their dingy and they start paddling... out of their comfort zone... out to sea to find a better life... sometimes it's stormy and they have to paddle harder... to find safe harbour.  But every time they leave their safe harbour, knowing that they'll eventually have to paddle out a storm, they get stronger... and they can paddle further or faster to their safe harbour.  They find things on their journey... they find peace and calm in the quiet seas... they find untold strength as they ride out the storm... and their safe harbours have treasures that the women who stay moored to the shore will never find.  Dingy women will push themselves into uncomfortable situations as they battle for health, fitness and finding the best life they can for themselves and their loved ones.  Moored women will appear to 'have it all' and 'never have to struggle', but really, you can only grow so much when you're not willing to pull up and break up your root ball a bit (holy mixed analogies batman!).

 

I want to be a Dingy Woman.  I want to island hop from safe harbour to safe harbour, riding out the storms in between.  I want to learn where my limits are as opposed to where I've set them for myself.  I want to look back on the storm and see that I not only survived but am thriving in my new safe harbour... until it's time to set sail once again.

 

And I feel for the moored woman.  She has already defeated herself by choosing to never venture out... never allow herself to have to work so hard she's empty... only to be filled up again.

 

I will raise my wine glass tonight (a few times) to the Dingy Women in my life... for you are beauty and strength!

 

Tarable

Shanny

Glenda

Kathleen - no blog... me sad :(

Public Service Announcement

 

So last night I did my couple of cleaning/purging items that I had pre-chosen during the day.  The junk drawer, the cabinet under the junk drawer and my tool/paint cabinet.

 

As I was saying to my mom last night, it's a far bit different cleaning to move than it is cleaning just to tidy up.  Things that over the last 11 years I have picked up out of that junk drawer and then put back are too  many to count... Maybe it's that the those times I wasn't ready to let items go, or maybe it's because your thought process for cleaning when it comes to moving is less emotional and more practical.  It's no secret that I'm an incredibly emotional person... Case in point, GreenMonkey.

I found GreenMonkey hidden in the top of the lockers that I sold on Sunday.  I won him playing boardwalk games in Disneyland... I was all by myself for an hour or so and decided to fool around... and I won GreenMonkey.  He has velcro on his hands, so I attached him around my carrypack and took him on all the rides with me for the rest of the trip.  He got flung into the back of the lockers at some point and I forgot all about him.  Until Sunday when I put him in with the garage sale stuff and carted him off to my mom's.  Only when we were going through the boxes so I could show her what I brought, I decided I didn't want to let him go so I stuffed him down the front of my shirt... and then took him out and flung him in the box... and then removed him from the box... and then handed him to my mom... and then ripped him out of her hands in the same second...

I realized in that instant that I had come to the end of my ability to cope with so much change and decided that GreenMonkey could hang out with me in my car until I felt a bit better.  Two friends have been in the car since and interacted with GreenMonkey... my explaination that he's only there temporarily and 'helping' me get through this change was well received... until I suggested yesterday that I knit him a sweater...

 

Anyway, that's my point... I'm emotionally driven and attach value to things that others may not... It's a damn wonder that I"m not a redzone hoarder!

 

In the midst of all of this change, I stumbled across a post on my favorite website asking for people to sign up for OneMatch, which is the former 'Unrelated Bone Marrow Donor Registery (UBMDR).  I used to donate blood all the time and then I became severely anemic and I tried a couple times but was turned down.  The OneMatch registery is very easy to sign up for... You fill out a questionairre online and then if you're eligible, they send you a mouth swab kit and you swab, send it back and done... then you just wait for the call (if you ever get one) stating that you're a match.

 

I would encourage everyone I know to sign up for this... bone marrow surgery (which is only one of the ways they get stem cells) is a reasonably uncomfortable endeavor (take a couple days off work and a few advil) but dying because you can't find a match would be worse... seeing your family member suffer or die because of some one chose not to do something as simple as register is unimaginable!

 

For Canadians, you want to go to www.onematch.ca

For Americans, you want to go to http://www.abmdr.org/home0.aspx

For the UK, you want to go to http://www.nhsbt.nhs.uk/bonemarrow/

 

For anywhere else, if you are having trouble finding your registry, let me know and I will help you.

 

Please.  One simple act could save a life.  As Canadian Blood Services says: 'It's in you to give'.

I'm out...

I'm out of mustard, margarine, ketchup and rice.

Fear not, for I didn't actually eat all of those things together... sort of.

The less food stuffs that I have to pack, the better.

 

I also thinned my book collection and my cook book collection.  In total, I'm donating 21 books and 31 cookbooks to the garage sale, along with a starbucks bag full of other stuff.

I found my Nintendo DS (with two chargers... lol.. that means that the one the ex took can't charge!) and my brand spanking new, never used PSP with a few games and I'm donating that to a women's shelter.  Apparently they need things that the kids of these women can do and all the devices are doing at my house is collecting dust.

 

Tonight I'm cleaning my bathroom and hopefully going through the tool cupboard and the paint cupboard.  I want to see if there's enough of any color in the paint cupboard to use in the new place.  I'm thinking that I might paint at least one wall in the bathroom the tiffany blue/teal color that I put in my living room last year.  I KNOW there's enough of that left...

 

Anyway, the battle rages on to clean and purge without disrupting the kitty...

'Did you just call me a Dumbass??' - or 'Why are you taking pictures of my building?'

Today I escaped.  I left everything that needs doing at home and ran away... into the glorious morning sun... sun I might add that we have not had in about 5 weeks... Sun which will not be here tomorrow... 

I got up early, gathered my laundry and my wits and headed out into the world to have coffee with my mom... it was partly a selfish endeavor because I wanted to offload the two boxes of garage sale items I pulled out of my house yesterday.

We had a lovely coffee and a small unlovely altercation with a real bitch ass woman in starbucks that I really SUPER wanted to punch in the face... I don't think I'd enjoy jail and I haven't much spare time for court dates so I called her a bitch and we left... Actually after I told my mom what she muttered to me under her breath, I had to drag her by the arm out the door because SHE was going to go punch the lady in the face (oh, I use the term 'lady' very loosely!).

Anyway, after that I called up Sam and headed over to his house.  I wasn't planning on spending the day doing nothing... I have a big fat list that needs tending to but we were having a lovely day so we just kept on keeping on.  

We went to our fave sushi restaurant and then decided to head down to the beach under the premise of taking pictures in order to a: lure our friend out here from Alberta and b: make everyone we know that doesn't live here jealous... 

It was gorgeous and we went for a nice walk and took some pictures... and then, Sam played the game he likes to play the most which is jamming his wide angle lens less than an inch from my face and rapid snapping pictures.  Since I know that these are the worlds UGLIEST pictures, I usually run away but I was sitting on a log... so I started screeching 'nononononoooo' really loud by accident and he told me later that he saw a couple whip around thinking he was attacking me... whoops!

After the beach we went to have Peanut Butter Cheesecake because I felt like I deserved a treat for getting through the last seven days.  It was goooood!  

Then we tried to put the cherry on the cake of the day (which was super awesome) and go down to the BCSPCA to snuggle kitties and look at puppies but we were late by 18 min... Sam blamed the cake.

After that I got home, cleaned out the fridge, took a nap and now I'm going to head back to bed... if I can stop sneezing... I'm a walking achoo and I've sneezed so hard so many times in a row that I've hurt my back.

Here's those pictures to make you jealous!

 

You're VERY strong!

That's what the guy that came to pick up some of my stuff said.  This afternoon I put a bunch of stuff on Craigslist for sale/free.  One of the things was my set of lockers.  I helped heave them up the stairs and then through the yard in the rain... Apparently I'm VERY strong... yes... that is true... in more ways than one!

Amazing what you find you can push yourself to when you don't really have a choice.  I mean, I have a choice to throw myself under my blankies and hope for the best, but that's not really reasonable.  When I broke up with Pat, I had a new storage locker, plans and had already wanted to start packing his stuff out within the first week.  No different now, only I'm the master of my own destiny.
 
I made $60 today and I got rid of all my outdoor stuff (the guy came for the free garden stuff and bought my bbq and patio chairs and took EVERYTHING.... even stuff I would consider garbage... yup!  It was awesome.  And then the guy came to take my lockers and that's the end of stuff I want to sell... or so I thought.

While I was waiting around for these guys to show up, I started cleaning out a cabinet... and then a drawer... and then another cabinet... and I now have two boxes overflowing of items to go to my mom's for her garage sale.  And good stuff too... lots of stuff that will be suggested to go for free (like my collection of brand new, unsharpened novelty pencils).  But also some good quality stuff... winter clothes, hats, wallet, fitness stuff, camping stuff (don't get all excited Kathleen, it's just two cheapo plastic 'lanterns'... I never camped without you!)

It's INSANE how ruthless I am with stuff... 

RUTHLESS!  And strong! ;)

Updates Galore!

 So I found a great little apartment in a nice little neighborhood in Vancouver.  The landlord is lovely and the suite is a 2 bedroom with hard wood floors throughout.  The kitty will stay inside and we will have a dedicated craft room!

The suite has laundry just five steps away, a parking spot about 10 steps away from my door, a small storage area for things I want to have in storage (suit case, christmas deco) but not all the way in my big storage.

 

My landlords (existing) are still completely crazy and yesterday after they gave me my reference and I got the apartment and handed over the damage deposit, they called me upstairs to tell me they changed their minds and I didn't have to move.  Boy was I pissed off!  I told them that it was too late and that in good faith I was making motions to get out of their way as quickly as possible and now that they'd decided that I didn't have to move they'd put me in a really bad position.  I negotiated with them that I was going to move and due to the miscommunication and the tribulation they put me through this week, I would not be paying April's rent and that would be the end of it.  They really want me to stay and I think they're genuinely sorry that they did what they did, but things that have been said/done cannot be unsaid/undone and I no longer feel comfortable living there.  Plus, I had emotionally gotten ready to be moving and started making plans and feeling a new fresh beginning coming on, so I am not willing to give that up.  They asked me to sleep on it and let them know today.

 

Well I got electricity, television, internet and phone service connected for April 26th, changed my address with half a dozen government agencies and my work, my cell phone, the vet and my storage company.  My drivers license is changed and my insurance now reflects my new address.

 

I've made plans for people to come and help me move, boxes to pack in and something to do with the cat while the packing/moving transition takes place... so what do you think my answer to them will be tonight?

 

I'M OUTTA HERE!

 

Pictures of the new place just as soon as I can get in there next week... I need to measure for some stuff!

Documentation

Sunday, March 25, 2012

7:21pm (28 seconds)  Mrs. called and asked if I was busy and could they please come down and chat with me.  I preferred them not to come in to the apartment as it agitates the cat so I volunteered to meet them upstairs in their living room.

I arrived two minutes later.

Mr. and Mrs. l stated that because of their daughters pending wedding, they had a lot of out of town guests coming, including Mrs’s mother who was coming from India.  Mrs. mother would be staying for two months for the wedding along with some other relatives and Mr. and Mrs. wanted her to stay with them at their home.

Mr. and Mrs. then stated that because they didn’t have room in their portion of the house, they wanted to give the relatives the suite downstairs, where I pay rent to live.

Before I could say anything, Mr. told me that they had a plan and that they had another property a few minutes away that was vacant at the moment and that they would like me to move there for the two months that their relatives were living downstairs.

They said that once the relatives left, that I could move back.

I questioned them, stating that it would be very difficult and disruptive to me to pack up everything in my home, furniture and contents included and move down the street for two months, only to pack again and move back.  Mr assured me that he would provide his son and nephew to do the physical moving but that I was on my own for packing.  At no time was any monetary compensation offered.

They told me at this time that if I did not take them up on their favor to temporarily move to the move to the more expensive place for the same price, then they would have no choice but to evict me.

At this time I inquired as to what the financial implications were to me and he assured me that I would continue to pay rent on my suite but would not be paying rent on the temporary suite.  He told me that he was doing me a favor because the rent on the temporary suite is market valued at $1000 but that he would not charge me the difference. Again, no monetary compensation was offered.  It was to be status quo with me paying rent, but packing and moving to a different temporary location.

I mentioned that if they were expecting me to move, then I would have to consider just moving entirely as with a full time job and obligations there was little to no way that I could undertake packing a two bedroom apartment and moving and then packing it back up and moving it back.  They said that they wanted me to stay living in their suite and that they were only doing this favor for me because of the long time tenancy, since I have lived there for 11+ years.

When I asked what their proposed timeline was for this, Mr., suggested that I was welcome to move out as soon as April 15.

Mr then suggested that we go and view the suite.

I agreed to go and see the suite.  It was not suitable for me in any way.

When we got home, Mr. and Mrs. asked me to tell them right away if I was going to temporarily move into their other home or move entirely because if I didn’t take the temporary suite they were going to rent it out and they had to know right away.

I told them that I did not have the ability to answer at that moment as I had only been aware of this situation they were putting toward me for an hour.

The next morning I phoned Mrs. at 8:11AM on March 26, 2012 and spoke to her for 44 seconds.

I asked her to please put a copy of my rental agreement (which I have never received) in the mailbox for me for when I got home and also a written statement of what they were asking me to do, complete with dates and financial information (no extra charge for the ‘more expensive’ suite).

Mrs. told me that they were not going to put it in writing because ‘we’re friends, that’s why we had a verbal conversation.  We’re going to do it verbally, not in writing unless you’re mad’.  I said ‘unless I’m what?’ and she responded saying that we’re friends and this was going to be taken care of verbally.

I asked her to please put the rental agreement in the mailbox for me and she said she would and hung up.  As of March 27, 2012 at 3:42pm, I have not received a copy of the rental agreement.

_______________________________

March 27, 2012 9pm.

I went upstairs to talk to Mr. and Mrs. as previously arranged.  Mrs was not present but Mr. said that we could talk anyway.

I told him that I was very offended by the suggestion that I move out for two months after I had made my home here and he acknowledged that he knew I was upset and offended.

I said that I didn’t think it was reasonable for them to expect me to pack up my apartment for two months and continue paying rent as a favor to them.

I told him about Section 49 and that they were required to give me two months’ notice before I had to move and that they had to pay the last month of rent.  Then I said that since two months from April 1 is passed the wedding date, that I would move out for May 1 but I wanted some incentive as legally I am entitled to stay until May 31.

Nav (daughter) entered the discussion and said that she didn’t think it was necessary to be discussing ‘legal’ things and that we should just figure this out as friends.  She said that they wanted me to do this as a favor to them and that there shouldn’t need to be an incentive to move out for two months when they were asking so nicely.

I told Mr. what my offer was to move out prior to the legal entitlement.

Two months rent, my existing damage deposit and the damage deposit for the new apartment and moving costs, all totaling $3200.

Mr. suggested that they just give me one month of rent.  I told him that I was already legally entitled to that month of rent but should be technically living there for May also, and that if he wanted me to move sooner, he would have to give me the May rent to which I am legally entitled AND an agreed upon incentive for the quicker move out.

Nav seemed to understand my position but said that she didn’t think it was fair.

She also said that her interpretation of the RTA was that if they gave two months notice, they didn’t have to pay last months rent.

Nav also said that if they hadn’t ‘accidentally’ told me that they wanted me to move for relatives, then they could have evicted me with only one months notice, no monetary incentive and just cancelled my residency in the suite.

I referred her to Section 49 of the RTA and she said that she would look it up herself because she read it earlier in the day and inferred that as landlords they were under no legal obligation to pay anything.

The conversation ended with Nav agreeing to explain the situation to her parents in their native tongue and that they would get back to me with their offer.

I said that unless the offer was mutually acceptable that I wouldn’t leave until May 31 and that they would still be required to pay the last month’s rent and the damage deposit.

Pros, Cons and why I have a stomach ache

 

Well, as per the post below... I'm moving.

 

I'm in a much better headspace now, but don't get me wrong, I'm still furious.  But I went and looked at and put an application in at an apartment that I could see myself living in for a while and it's given me a little bit of clarity that I'm going to be okay.

 

This whole thing has been a bit difficult to process... It's only been about 36 hours since I found out, so it's not that surprising that I'm having a few brain gliches.  In that case, a list or two...

 

Pros

 

No longer in a basement suite (I didn't mind it but I'd like to look out the window and not be eye level with the sidewalk)

The wind won't howl through the gap in the door making the house sound haunted (that used to REALLY creep me out)

No more carpet which means no more vacuuming.  Swiffer all the way baby!

Dedicated craft room (if I get a two bedroom)

Laundry in the building (just steps from 'my' apartment... I can do laundry in the middle of the night if I want!)

There is common area carpet between outside and my door... no more tracking outside right in!

The cat stays inside so I don't have to worry about him getting in fights or getting run over

It's a 9 min walk to a pretty nice shopping area with lots of cafes and one of my fave sushi places

The furniture i have in storage will all fit

There is no bad memories or reminders... it's a completely fresh start

No one will know where I live unless I tell them

I can likely get a small deep freeze

 

 

Cons

 

there's no outdoor space so no more bbq or patio chairs

The cat has to stay inside (I'm worried about him becoming really miserable)

Litter box!

It's more expensive

There's not a lot of visitor parking

It's farther away from my peeps

It would be more than a seven minute drive to Hardeep's

 

 

Worries (or why I have a stomach ache)

 

Packing the fridge/freezer

Making a new neighborhood 'my' neighborhood

The cat being upset

That I probably can't take or reuse the vinyl decals on my walls

That I might not be able to take my crystal chandelier with me

That I have to put the kitty in the cat hotel and then power pack because he might run away when he sees packing boxes

Confronting my landlords for money ** more on this below

That my landlords will not give me a good reference because they're mad at me

 

 

So I've decided that since my landlords illegally told me I had to move and are being inconsiderate (asking someone to move for two months, continue paying rent and then move back, all with no monetary compensation), I'm going to make them a deal.  Either pay me a significant amount of money (three months rent) and I'll move out for May 1... OR... I'll take the two months I"m legally entitled to, they'll still owe me one month rent and my damage deposit and I'll move on May 26th, which is their daughters wedding day and they're having the party in the back yard.  I'll make full use of my outside area to stage moving ahead of time, when they're having all their pre-parties and I'm pretty sure it will be a disruptive and unpleasant looking mess.  Plus, they won't be able to use the suite for the time prior to the wedding for their out of town guests.

Either way... fine by me ;) (but not really because I don't like confrontation... I want them to give me what I want.... and they need to decide asap because I need to make arrangements for the kitty hotel)

 

I'm super stressed... punctuated by times of feeling excited by this new living adventure...

 

Any advice on my cons or more pros you can think of would be much appreciated.

Just not a good time

Maybe this time of year just isn't a good time for me... 

I rec'd a call at 7 tonight asking me to come upstairs and talk to my landlords.  I knew EXACTLY what it was they were going to tell me and I was right.
I'm kicked out.  They're having a wedding in May and about three thousand people from India are coming for the wedding and they want my apartment to let some of them live there for three months.
That's right.  May.  It's March 25 right now.  I had planned to move this year, when my tax debt was paid off... but no... I'm now required to move asap... as in, in the next month.

I spoke to Sam, who was more calm than I was and it turns out that the Landlords are not playing fair, they owe me a lot of money based on this and technically they can't make me leave till June 1st.  I'm going to file a complaint with RTA, but I'm not going to stay here through the wedding... I may as well just get going.

I've cried a lot tonight... being kicked out of your home doesn't feel nice.  Nope.

Long Overdue

Long overdue for a little show and tell...

I'm wearing my very first hand knit sweater today.  It's actually the second day I've worn it.

I didn't do an excellent job of blocking it, so it needs to be redone, but for now, it's just fine!

For anyone interested, I knit it out of Alafosslopi (3.1 skeins) on US 10.5 needles and I modified the pattern to include sleeves.  It's Shalom on Ravelry.  The button is from a woodworker on Vancouver Island.

Tax Related Saga

Last night I was having a killer craving for Coke Zero.  I only ever drink water with an occassional coffee on the weekends thrown in.  So when a craving such as that comes up, I have no choice but to succumb.  When I got my beverage home I realized that there's no ice in the freezer and the pop was warm from sitting on the grocery shelf.  So I did what any right minded person would do and I used Citrus Vodka that lives in the freezer to cool my drink... yes... I used enough ice cold vodka to make an entire can of coke cold... twice!

After successfully knitting for a bit and then taking an allergy pill, apparently instead of going to bed like I had planned, I did (read as 'fooled around with') my taxes.

Having not prepared for such an event, I used the only pencil in my house, which has no eraser and a VERY dull lead.
About an hour later I had done them three times... each time coming up with a different alarming number for what I owed.

I came to work this morning and immediately got on Turbo Tax and did a 'test' to see how accurate I was.  Apparently not so much... because I actually get a refund... which is a departure from the outcome of my first attempt, which said I owed $2900.

Moral:  Don't use freezer vodka to make your warm coke cool... it doesn't lead anywhere good.

MORAL: At least drink enough to not be able to hold the pencil...

Good Monday Morning!

I was told today at 7:45 that I seemed like I was in an awfully good mood... I told the guy that said it that no one had given me bad news yet today so I was holding on to my positive energy for as long as I could... It's now 10:45 and still no bad news...  (work related bad news has already seeped in to my day and ruined it by 8am almost every day)

 

This weekend was quite fun... also quite restful.  I think I'm coming down with something or fighting something off because I slept a LOT this weekend.

 

On Friday Sam and I usually have Friday night dinner, but he was and I quote 'dead busy' doing school work and I was so tired my eyes were watering at 3pm, so we cancelled dinner.  I went home with the intention of having a short (operative word was short) nap and then off to do some errands... At 10pm I woke up to send a quick text to Glenda to find out when we were meeting the next morning and then fell back asleep. With all the lights on... weird!

 

On Saturday morning we got together for a nice breakfast at Roots Cafe and then we made the epic trek out to Abbotsford to check out Fibres West.  It was bigger than last year.. all of our favorites were still there, plus some new vendors.

 

It was a lot of fun and we both got some goodies... I found a button for my new sweater...it's cherry and walnut and handcrafted by a man on Vancouver Island.  He himself actually helped me pick out the perfect button for my sweater. 

 

 

All in all, my sweater cost me $23 in yarn and $6 for a button.  The pattern was free.  I'd say that's a pretty good deal, wouldn't you?

 

I also bought some AMAZING alpaca for my next sweater... it's going to cost substantially more than $29 from start to finish, but I don't care... The yarn is a gorgeous gray and brown natural mix and soft as a cloud!   

 

The only problem with this yarn is that it's not the right guage for the sweater I'm making so apparently I'll have to do some math... I did a guage swatch tho... I'm told that should help...

 

The last thing I bought was some vintage rayon seam binding to use to try and fix my Cedar Trees scarf that just won't lay flat...

 

After we left the festival (with a quick stop at the vending machine for Cheezies (My sweet American Friends... you should do whatever you can to convince your Canadian friends to send these to you!), we headed out on our own little Yarn Crawl... not often either of us get out to the Valley, so we decided to make it worth our while...

 

 

We stopped at one yarn store where we learned all the things that we're not crazy about in yarn stores... and we didn't buy a thing... the whole trip there was summed up for me by the sight of a staff member spending inordinate amounts of time untangling a ball of pastel blue fun fur... My personal thought on it was 'I wouldn't pay you to stand there and do that... throw it out!...

This store had samples that were knit 7-8 years ago (the woman actually told us this!), white wire shelving and  a really loud, sort of manic vibe.

 

After that we went to a gorgeous store in Port Moody.  It's everything that a yarn store should be.  Very friendly creative staff, samples straight off the needles of gorgeous and currently popular items and a lovely set up with beautiful wood shelves and interesting manequins and display items. It was a pleasure to just be in the store, looking, touching, chatting...

I bought buttons... shocking, I know!

 

 

Finally we headed back into town and stopped at one last store on Hastings.  It's quite a different vibe... very young and hip and trendy with friendly, very easy going staff.  They had samples of garments that were designed by their employees and great display shelving and unique packaging of fibre.

 

That was the end of Saturday and Sunday was spent in my jammies... then I had a shower and changed into fresh jammies... Exciting ya?

 

No big plans for this week... work is kind of crazy and now I have sweater worth of yarn to knit with... Waahooo!